Believing Him for more than I can imagine!

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Santa Rosa, Ca., United States
"Now all these things are from God, who reconciled us to Himself through Christ and gave us the ministry of reconciliation, namely, that God was in Christ reconciling the world to Himself, not counting their trespasses against them, and He has committed to us the word of reconciliation. Therefore, we are ambassadors for Christ, as though God were making an appeal through us; we beg you on behalf of Christ, be reconciled to God" 2 Corinthians 5:18-20

Monday, July 8, 2013

His Rod And His Staff, They Comfort Me...


          I woke up this morning irritated at everything, it was just one of those mornings when no matter what you do, you just can't clear out the bad and usher in the good in any quick kind of way. I wish I could have just pulled out the thorn in my Spirit and gotten on with the morning, but that was not happening mainly because I couldn't find the thorn. I couldn't figure out what was wrong, I had no reason to feel the way that I did, not a reason I could recognize and I was irritated at that too!

            I decided to have a mandatory "time out" at 8:30 am and told my son Sam who is ridiculously bright and cheery early in the morning, that he should probably play with Lego's for a little bit in his room while Mommy found her nice self and left her ugly self at Gods feet. He knew exactly what I was talking about and complied happily. I think he was hoping it would take place sooner than later having already witnessed my irritation before breakfast! I grabbed my Bible and sat on my couch.

              I had already been in the Word this morning, but it was different this time. I felt like I was laying myself on the operating table and asking the Doctor to do what ever He had to, whatever needed to be done, because I was not going to leave until the thorn was uncovered and removed. I was just about to pray, I hadn't even opened my Bible yet, and all of a sudden in my mind I saw a picture. It was of one little lamb standing in front of his shepherd. The shepherd had a staff in his hand and was extending it out toward the side of the lamb, like he was about to run it along the lamb's side, to inspect it, to gently check under its thick wool looking for wounds or anything the shepherd needed to attend to. It was then I heard in my heart a verse in Psalm 23 "...His rod and His staff they comfort me." it's at the end of the 4th verse. I had looked up the words in the original language about two years ago and was comforted at what I had found. I think of it often, but this morning I saw it in a picture in my mind and heard it in my heart.

            It was during a season of deep growth and painful letting go in my life that I clung to this verse. It was a precious time of seeking and wrestling things out with God after some heavy things had happened in my life. I find myself there again in this season of life in a different way, not because of painful circumstances this time, but still the desire to go deeper and not be left the same is an obsession. 

              I remember the word "rod" in Hebrew "shebet" translated into so much more than just a rod by which to walk, it also has the definition of a "truncheon or sceptre" (mark of authority) a description of a club (like of a shepherd's implement) and of an instrument to write with. I had this picture of God using His rod to inspect me, His sheep, for anything that didn't belong, maybe a wound untreated or a thorn needing removal.Then using His staff with authority to protect me from the enemy's plans and schemes, fighting off harm and fighting for my good. I even pictured how He uses His rod to direct me back to His path, the right path. Using it to write His word on my heart, to replace lies I had believed and deeply carve His love on my heart. I could picture His staff running down my side looking for the sore spots, finding the thorns, and although I wanted to run from the pain, I wanted them removed even more. I was having to let Him go deep to remove what didn't belong, to let healing, real healing begin!

       This morning I was reminded of how many times I see His sheep run from Him, from His rod and staff. Maybe afraid of letting Him uncover what needs to be uncovered, maybe afraid of the pain, afraid He will have to go deep to remove the thorns and instead they run to other sheep looking for healing and relief, or to the pleasures and traps of this world, only to be disappointed and wounded deeper. I have watched His sheep live sick and wounded rather than have Him comfort them with His rod and His staff. I was that lost sheep who ran to hills and countrysides filled with predators and disease, I ended up sick and wounded, clinging to life in desperate need of the Shepherds touch to recover from my wandering and disillusionment. He met me with forgiveness and grace, treating my wounds and healing my heart.
         
            I run to Him now, wanting nothing more than His touch, nothing more than for Him to search me, uncover what doesn't belong, tend to wounds and infection, treat them with His tender care and direct me in paths of righteousness for His name sake. And like the good Shepherd that He is, this morning He uncovered a thorn of bitterness and removed it with tenderness and mercy. I find myself everyday listening for my shepherds voice, looking for His presence, making sure I don't wander from His vision, wanting nothing more than to feel that rod and staff running down my side, knowing He is near. His rod and His staff...they comfort me.

                                          The Lord is my shepherd,
I shall not want.
 He makes me lie down in green pastures;
He leads me beside quiet waters.
 He restores my soul;
He guides me in the paths of righteousness
For His name’s sake.
 Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death,
fear no evil, for You are with me;
Your rod and Your staff, they comfort me.
 You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies;
You have anointed my head with oil;
My cup overflows.
 Surely goodness and lovingkindness will follow me all the days of my life,
And I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever

I   

another little piece of my heart ...